Pondering the Puzzle

"The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive."

Recent events have made me consider life somewhat deeper than usual... And I find myself pondering the old questions, "Life, what is it all about...". But alas I know greater minds than mine have applied themselves to this question, so I must concede defeat...

However, when a was asked by a good friend "What am I searching for?" this gave me the opportunity to focus on a somewhat smaller line of enquiry, my own life and what it's about instead. Now whilst, pondering this puzzle, I'm reminded that our own lives are nothing more than the succession of choices that as individuals we make...

The difficulty with these choices though is no-one knows what's out there, what life has install for them, there are no certainties, none. Then to make matters worse we have to make these descisions on our own, theres no-one to tell us the right things to do, or tell us the sure bet or to show us the way...

Alone we make these choices based on pure speculation, these choices control every part of our future lives...

Now some of these choices are easy and straightforward, but usually the 'big mothers' tend to be very difficult. Which is why, most of the time we choose to avoid making the tough calls, for fear of the unknown, fear of the effects the choice may have, or for fear of failure...

So looking back on the choices in my life I've made, the common theme is in the pursuit of my life goal, to be happy. Alas though this goal can be at times a blinding one and all to often it seems I either don't think through the situation properly, or I just let my emotions take control and become confused and wrapped up within my own agendas to see the effects I may be having on other people...

And there in lies the Rub. The reason we fear choice and tend not to make the tough calls is because of the effect they might have on the people we love and care for the most, directly or indirectly if they get caught in the wake...

Then theres an even bigger problem, what if the Choice you make gets Fcuk-Up and goes FUBAR? Then it seems this only achieves hurting the people we love the most even more, be they friends, family, or lovers...

So where are we...? Well what I'm saying is that we all have to make these Big Choices at some point in our lives. So lets not judge the person for making them, even if they have Fcuked-Up, that's a far to simplistic thing to do. Instead look behind the obvious to the reasons why they made that choice and if their intentions where honourable even if they've hurt you, try to forgive them. They are after all only trying to be brave with life... And that as we all know can be a frightening, bewildering and shitty business...

Finally if by the Choices I have made in my life I have hurt anyone, please forgive me, I don't believe I have ever meant to hurt anyone out of malice. However, I do take risks, maybe to many, and quite often my choices do fcuk up :-/

"Destiny is not a matter of chance; but a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, It is a thing to be acheived." - William Bryan

Ciao Ciao
Confused from Chichester

I BLOG There4 I Am